aussietrend
02-28-2002, 09:29 PM
[b:ff41b66a9f]Here are a few 'Murrayisms' (some classic Murray Walker blunders)[/b:ff41b66a9f]
"The car in front is absolutely unique, except for the one behind which is identical!"
"He's obviously gone in for a wheel change. I say obviously because I can't see it"
"With half the race gone, there is half the race still to go"
"Do my eyes deceive me, or is Senna's Lotus sounding rough ?"
"Anything happens in Grand Prix racing and it usually does"
"... Mansell can see him in his earphone..."
Murray: "There's a fiery glow coming from the back of the Ferrari."
James: "No Murray, that's his rear safety light."
"...and he's lost both right front tyres"
"And there's the man in the green flag!"
"...and there's no damage to the car.....except to the car itself."
"And the first five places are filled by five different cars."
"The Italian GP at Monaco..."
Murray: "And there are flames coming from the back of Prost's car as he enters the swimming pool."
James: "Well, that should put them out then."
"Alesi is in second place and Hill is in second place..."
"As you can see, visually, with your eyes..."
"Andrea de Cesaris...the man who has won more Grand Prix than anyone else without actually winning one of them."
"....Schumacher crosses the line to start another lap, and there's nothing there!"
"And we have had 5 races so far this year, Brazil, Argentina, Imola, Schumacher and Monaco!"
"Alain Prost is in a commanding second place"
"..and Damon Hill is following Damon Hill"
"with Alesi in 4th and 5th"
"Schumacher has made his final stop three times!"
"Nigel Mansell had a problem with the wheel-nut on his Williams, then he went on to win brilliantly for Ferrari!"
"And he's done that in a whisker under 10 seconds, call it 9.7 in round figures".
"you can’t see the digital clock because there isn’t one."
"and thats one of the mechanics using a feeler gauge to measure the depth of tread in the slick."
"He (Jackie Stewart) will not produce a winner, but if he can produce second, it will be the next best thing."
"Well he's world champion, and we only get one of those a year."
"I should imagine that the conditions in the cockpit are unimaginable!"
"And will Jacques Villeneuve be racing with Williams next year? Well, we will only know that in the future."
"And that piece of water on the right is not the St. Lawrence Seaway, it is the Olympic rowing strip which I have walked down."
"A battle is developing between them...I say developing because it's not yet on."
"Schumacher wouldn't have let him past voluntarily. Of course he did it voluntarily, but he had to do it"
"I can't believe what's happening visually, in front of my eyes".
"Well, now, Villeneuve is now twelve seconds ahead of Villeneuve"
"I've no idea what Eddie Irvine's orders are, but he's following them superlatively well."
"They're both super starters, but Mika Hakkinen is a superer starter!"
"There is a man with a great Grand Prix future behind him!"
"There is nothing wrong with the car except that it is on fire."
"The first four cars are both on the same tyres."
"Except for his car, he's the only man on the track."
"And Michael Schumacher is actually in a very good position. He is in last place."
"The crowd holds its joint breath!"
"Look up there! That's the sky!"
"A sad ending, albeit a happy one, here at Montreal for today's Grand Prix."
"All I can tell you is that David Coulthard keeps on accelerating and closing up to David Coulthard."
"I make no apologies for their absence. I'm sorry they're not here."
"He's here again for the first time."
"And Michael Schumacher, as I expected, is now extending his lead over Michael Schumacher!"
"...in 12th and 13th the two Jaguars of Eddie Irvine.
"This is an interesting circuit because it has inclines, and not just up, but down as well."
"The Benetton...handling superbly as ever. Williams have worked very, very hard on this car at the beginning of the season."
"Even in five years' time, he (Coulthard) will still be four years younger than Damon Hill."
"Nigel Mansell is in third position! He's gone up from seventh to sixth to fourth to fifth and now to third!"
"And Nelson Piquet must be furious with himself inside his helmet."
"We now have exactly the same situation as at the beginning of the race, only exactly opposite."
"His hopes, which were nil before, are absolutely zero now."
"Ukyo Katayama is undoubtedly the best Formula One driver that Grand Prix racing has ever produced!"
"Ralf Schumacher has been upstaged by the teenager, Jenson Button, who is 20."
"He can't decide whether to have his visor half open or half closed."
"He's pushing that Mercedes Bengine ... Benz engine ..."
"Heinz Harald Frentzen has already won three Grands Prix this year - two of them last year..."
"And for some really superb driving ... watch THIS!!!" (followed by a crash)
"The Arrows is in! The mechanics attack the car!"
"He's lost both right front tyres."
"BMW are entirely new to Formula One. They left it so long ago!"
"With modern technology and fantastic car-to-pits radio, Piquet now knows he can see Prost in front of him."
"The faster he goes the quicker he'll get to the pits. The slower he goes the longer it will take"
"And once again the determination, the sheer grit, the driving skill, and the tactics of Alan Jones allied to the legendary reliability of the Williams car is paying off .... (then) Jones is in TROUBLE!!!"
"Michael Schumacher has just gone round in 1.4 seconds!"
"Schumacher is the fastest man on the track. He's going round quicker than anybody else."
"And now the boot is on the other Schumacher!"
"Schumacher is still the fastest man on the track, not only by virtue of the fact that he leads the Australian Grand Prix, but he also holds the fastest lap."
"Schumacher virtually pedalling his Benetton back with his fists"
"Twenty four points for Schumacher, twenty three points for Hill, so there's only one point between them if my mental arithmetic is correct."
" ... and Edson Arantes di Nascimento, commonly known to us as Pele hands the award to Damon Hill, commonly known to us as ... um... Damon ... Hill ... "
Murray: "And Barrichello has a good chance to pass Trulli here..."
Martin: "Actually, those waved yellow flags will prevent that in this section"
"Once again Damon Hill is modest in defeat."
"STOP! STOP! Under the bridge there! That's a Williams Renault ... my guess is it's Villeneuve, I'm not going to make any statements until we see the driver ... IT'S HILL! It's Damon Hill!"
"But here is now and there is Damon Hill!"
"Michael Schumacher leading Damon Hill by four tenths of a second or so, because it's moving ... and that's not four tenths of a second, that's Michael Schumacher!"
"And Damon Hill is coming into the pit lane, yes it's Damon Hill coming into the Williams pit ... and Damon Hill is in the pit ... No, it's Michael Schumacher!"
Murray: "Thats a Benetton upside down"
Martin: "It's a Sauber"
"Hill congratulates Schumacher. They are not bosom buddies, but they're not far off!"
"And that's an engine blowing!! It's .... it's Damon Hill ... euggghhh..."
"He doesn't know - but if anyone knows, he would."
"Alesi is in second place with Hill in second place!"
"And on lap 72 out of 71 Damon Hill leads!!"
Murray: "How do they do that, Martin? How does a man talk calmly and especially to his team boss, when Damon in the situation he's in?"
Martin Brundle: "Well, you press a little button on the steering wheel and start talking, Murray."
"Damon Hill is leading and behind him are the second and third men!"
"The two McLaren drivers are so hot they look like 2 fried lobsters in silver suits"
".. the yellow intimidating colour of that Ferrari ..."
"That's history. I say history because it happened in the past"
"Rene Arnoux is coming into the pits ... lets stop the startwatch"
"..in fact IF is F1 spelt backwards!"
"It's lap 26 of 58, which unless I'm very much mistaken is half way"
"BMW who are entirely new to F1... since they left it so long ago."
"Two McLarens on the first row of the grid, two Ferraris on the first row of the grid..."
"Blown it for Ferrari!!!......Blown it for Irvine!!!.......I don't know what happened, but there was a major malmisorganization problem there!!!"
"..and Michael Schumacher is leading Michael Schumacher"
"And here comes Mika Hakkinen, double world champion twice over..."
"Its Senna, its Senna,"
Pause.. "its either Mansell or Senna."
"Freedom of Budapest for Bernie Ecclestone. There's a laugh. He could buy the place and still have enough left for Berlin."
"So let's assume that Michael Schumacher wins this race, whoa!" (Schuey slides on a white line just as Murray talks about him)
"McLaren and Ferrari have won six races each this year. Mika Hakkinen has won three, David Coulthard has won three, Michael Schumacher has won five and Rubens Barrichello has won five."
"And the rain came down and washed the circuit dry"
"...and Schumacher has just completed lap 77 out of 73"
"Coulthard leads the Europe GP, and now all he needs to do is avoid trouble, OH THATS COULTHARD OUT!!!"
Murray: "Thats a Benetton upside down"
Martin: "It's a Sauber"
" The Jordans lead on lap 40 and errr.. If you haven't got your heart in your mouth then you jolly well should have!"
"Damon Hill leads as Ayrton Senna sits in the pit lane!"
Moments later.. "Ayrton Senna leads, it was the lapped car of Alain Prost that went through."
"And Michael is lapping about two seconds a lap slower than his brother Michael." (when M Schumacher was about to lap R Schumacher).
"BAR are 4th in the constructors championship, this is an excellent performance considering their debut year in 1991!"
M.W "Here comes the Minardi of Marc Gene!"
M.B "That's Badoer, Murray!"
"You can't see Alesi's Ferrari because it isn't there!"
"Jean Alesi is reborn. Last year he was driving a car that he couldn't have done well in even if it had had two engines in it, never mind one."
Murray: "Now we go on to another 16 races, the next one is at Brazil, Sao Paulo, in two weeks time."
Martin: "I'm going to Malaysia, first, Murray."
"And David Coulthard does stay ahead of Coulthard." (Personally, I don't think David is THAT fast - sorry McLaren fans)
"Senna is 3rd with Mansell 2nd and Piquet 3rd!"
"This will be Williams' first win since the last time a Williams won."
"By the way, 1kg of fuel is equivalent to 0.02 s per lap"
"If that isn't a lap record I'll eat the hat I don't normally wear."
"The status quo could well be as it was before."
"Jenson Button is in the top ten, in eleventh position."
"We all make mistakes and I certainly made a whopper there."
"The car in front is absolutely unique, except for the one behind which is identical!"
"He's obviously gone in for a wheel change. I say obviously because I can't see it"
"With half the race gone, there is half the race still to go"
"Do my eyes deceive me, or is Senna's Lotus sounding rough ?"
"Anything happens in Grand Prix racing and it usually does"
"... Mansell can see him in his earphone..."
Murray: "There's a fiery glow coming from the back of the Ferrari."
James: "No Murray, that's his rear safety light."
"...and he's lost both right front tyres"
"And there's the man in the green flag!"
"...and there's no damage to the car.....except to the car itself."
"And the first five places are filled by five different cars."
"The Italian GP at Monaco..."
Murray: "And there are flames coming from the back of Prost's car as he enters the swimming pool."
James: "Well, that should put them out then."
"Alesi is in second place and Hill is in second place..."
"As you can see, visually, with your eyes..."
"Andrea de Cesaris...the man who has won more Grand Prix than anyone else without actually winning one of them."
"....Schumacher crosses the line to start another lap, and there's nothing there!"
"And we have had 5 races so far this year, Brazil, Argentina, Imola, Schumacher and Monaco!"
"Alain Prost is in a commanding second place"
"..and Damon Hill is following Damon Hill"
"with Alesi in 4th and 5th"
"Schumacher has made his final stop three times!"
"Nigel Mansell had a problem with the wheel-nut on his Williams, then he went on to win brilliantly for Ferrari!"
"And he's done that in a whisker under 10 seconds, call it 9.7 in round figures".
"you can’t see the digital clock because there isn’t one."
"and thats one of the mechanics using a feeler gauge to measure the depth of tread in the slick."
"He (Jackie Stewart) will not produce a winner, but if he can produce second, it will be the next best thing."
"Well he's world champion, and we only get one of those a year."
"I should imagine that the conditions in the cockpit are unimaginable!"
"And will Jacques Villeneuve be racing with Williams next year? Well, we will only know that in the future."
"And that piece of water on the right is not the St. Lawrence Seaway, it is the Olympic rowing strip which I have walked down."
"A battle is developing between them...I say developing because it's not yet on."
"Schumacher wouldn't have let him past voluntarily. Of course he did it voluntarily, but he had to do it"
"I can't believe what's happening visually, in front of my eyes".
"Well, now, Villeneuve is now twelve seconds ahead of Villeneuve"
"I've no idea what Eddie Irvine's orders are, but he's following them superlatively well."
"They're both super starters, but Mika Hakkinen is a superer starter!"
"There is a man with a great Grand Prix future behind him!"
"There is nothing wrong with the car except that it is on fire."
"The first four cars are both on the same tyres."
"Except for his car, he's the only man on the track."
"And Michael Schumacher is actually in a very good position. He is in last place."
"The crowd holds its joint breath!"
"Look up there! That's the sky!"
"A sad ending, albeit a happy one, here at Montreal for today's Grand Prix."
"All I can tell you is that David Coulthard keeps on accelerating and closing up to David Coulthard."
"I make no apologies for their absence. I'm sorry they're not here."
"He's here again for the first time."
"And Michael Schumacher, as I expected, is now extending his lead over Michael Schumacher!"
"...in 12th and 13th the two Jaguars of Eddie Irvine.
"This is an interesting circuit because it has inclines, and not just up, but down as well."
"The Benetton...handling superbly as ever. Williams have worked very, very hard on this car at the beginning of the season."
"Even in five years' time, he (Coulthard) will still be four years younger than Damon Hill."
"Nigel Mansell is in third position! He's gone up from seventh to sixth to fourth to fifth and now to third!"
"And Nelson Piquet must be furious with himself inside his helmet."
"We now have exactly the same situation as at the beginning of the race, only exactly opposite."
"His hopes, which were nil before, are absolutely zero now."
"Ukyo Katayama is undoubtedly the best Formula One driver that Grand Prix racing has ever produced!"
"Ralf Schumacher has been upstaged by the teenager, Jenson Button, who is 20."
"He can't decide whether to have his visor half open or half closed."
"He's pushing that Mercedes Bengine ... Benz engine ..."
"Heinz Harald Frentzen has already won three Grands Prix this year - two of them last year..."
"And for some really superb driving ... watch THIS!!!" (followed by a crash)
"The Arrows is in! The mechanics attack the car!"
"He's lost both right front tyres."
"BMW are entirely new to Formula One. They left it so long ago!"
"With modern technology and fantastic car-to-pits radio, Piquet now knows he can see Prost in front of him."
"The faster he goes the quicker he'll get to the pits. The slower he goes the longer it will take"
"And once again the determination, the sheer grit, the driving skill, and the tactics of Alan Jones allied to the legendary reliability of the Williams car is paying off .... (then) Jones is in TROUBLE!!!"
"Michael Schumacher has just gone round in 1.4 seconds!"
"Schumacher is the fastest man on the track. He's going round quicker than anybody else."
"And now the boot is on the other Schumacher!"
"Schumacher is still the fastest man on the track, not only by virtue of the fact that he leads the Australian Grand Prix, but he also holds the fastest lap."
"Schumacher virtually pedalling his Benetton back with his fists"
"Twenty four points for Schumacher, twenty three points for Hill, so there's only one point between them if my mental arithmetic is correct."
" ... and Edson Arantes di Nascimento, commonly known to us as Pele hands the award to Damon Hill, commonly known to us as ... um... Damon ... Hill ... "
Murray: "And Barrichello has a good chance to pass Trulli here..."
Martin: "Actually, those waved yellow flags will prevent that in this section"
"Once again Damon Hill is modest in defeat."
"STOP! STOP! Under the bridge there! That's a Williams Renault ... my guess is it's Villeneuve, I'm not going to make any statements until we see the driver ... IT'S HILL! It's Damon Hill!"
"But here is now and there is Damon Hill!"
"Michael Schumacher leading Damon Hill by four tenths of a second or so, because it's moving ... and that's not four tenths of a second, that's Michael Schumacher!"
"And Damon Hill is coming into the pit lane, yes it's Damon Hill coming into the Williams pit ... and Damon Hill is in the pit ... No, it's Michael Schumacher!"
Murray: "Thats a Benetton upside down"
Martin: "It's a Sauber"
"Hill congratulates Schumacher. They are not bosom buddies, but they're not far off!"
"And that's an engine blowing!! It's .... it's Damon Hill ... euggghhh..."
"He doesn't know - but if anyone knows, he would."
"Alesi is in second place with Hill in second place!"
"And on lap 72 out of 71 Damon Hill leads!!"
Murray: "How do they do that, Martin? How does a man talk calmly and especially to his team boss, when Damon in the situation he's in?"
Martin Brundle: "Well, you press a little button on the steering wheel and start talking, Murray."
"Damon Hill is leading and behind him are the second and third men!"
"The two McLaren drivers are so hot they look like 2 fried lobsters in silver suits"
".. the yellow intimidating colour of that Ferrari ..."
"That's history. I say history because it happened in the past"
"Rene Arnoux is coming into the pits ... lets stop the startwatch"
"..in fact IF is F1 spelt backwards!"
"It's lap 26 of 58, which unless I'm very much mistaken is half way"
"BMW who are entirely new to F1... since they left it so long ago."
"Two McLarens on the first row of the grid, two Ferraris on the first row of the grid..."
"Blown it for Ferrari!!!......Blown it for Irvine!!!.......I don't know what happened, but there was a major malmisorganization problem there!!!"
"..and Michael Schumacher is leading Michael Schumacher"
"And here comes Mika Hakkinen, double world champion twice over..."
"Its Senna, its Senna,"
Pause.. "its either Mansell or Senna."
"Freedom of Budapest for Bernie Ecclestone. There's a laugh. He could buy the place and still have enough left for Berlin."
"So let's assume that Michael Schumacher wins this race, whoa!" (Schuey slides on a white line just as Murray talks about him)
"McLaren and Ferrari have won six races each this year. Mika Hakkinen has won three, David Coulthard has won three, Michael Schumacher has won five and Rubens Barrichello has won five."
"And the rain came down and washed the circuit dry"
"...and Schumacher has just completed lap 77 out of 73"
"Coulthard leads the Europe GP, and now all he needs to do is avoid trouble, OH THATS COULTHARD OUT!!!"
Murray: "Thats a Benetton upside down"
Martin: "It's a Sauber"
" The Jordans lead on lap 40 and errr.. If you haven't got your heart in your mouth then you jolly well should have!"
"Damon Hill leads as Ayrton Senna sits in the pit lane!"
Moments later.. "Ayrton Senna leads, it was the lapped car of Alain Prost that went through."
"And Michael is lapping about two seconds a lap slower than his brother Michael." (when M Schumacher was about to lap R Schumacher).
"BAR are 4th in the constructors championship, this is an excellent performance considering their debut year in 1991!"
M.W "Here comes the Minardi of Marc Gene!"
M.B "That's Badoer, Murray!"
"You can't see Alesi's Ferrari because it isn't there!"
"Jean Alesi is reborn. Last year he was driving a car that he couldn't have done well in even if it had had two engines in it, never mind one."
Murray: "Now we go on to another 16 races, the next one is at Brazil, Sao Paulo, in two weeks time."
Martin: "I'm going to Malaysia, first, Murray."
"And David Coulthard does stay ahead of Coulthard." (Personally, I don't think David is THAT fast - sorry McLaren fans)
"Senna is 3rd with Mansell 2nd and Piquet 3rd!"
"This will be Williams' first win since the last time a Williams won."
"By the way, 1kg of fuel is equivalent to 0.02 s per lap"
"If that isn't a lap record I'll eat the hat I don't normally wear."
"The status quo could well be as it was before."
"Jenson Button is in the top ten, in eleventh position."
"We all make mistakes and I certainly made a whopper there."